guilt
A major problem returned peace corps volunteers face is guilt. It is one that I can not escape, especially living in country. The fact of the matter is that once I left peace corps, I could escape a life of extreme poverty. Not to say I am not still poor, but I went from living on $200 dollars a month to living on $500 to $600 and I make much more that that.

This $500 to $600 lifestyle allows for a maid and for ice cream, cokes and vacations. Things I often can not enjoy. My maid makes $80 dollars a month. She works a couple hours 4 times a week. This money includes her transportation, so her take home is around $50 a month. I have met two of her children, but I know she has more. My husbands family lives on around $200 a month. That includes $100 a month from me and Mowdou. On average 13 people live at the family house. Most of them are not working or working and not making money.

Things were not that bad, but now food prices are raising. The prime minister of Mauritania says that no one is suffering. However, I visited my friends and family in Kiffa. People are suffering. I saw a number of people go from surviving to barely surviving or dieing. I was an honored guest as I walked around town and people offered their best. That is what makes me so sad and so guilty. They could offer me so little.

Still, what can I do? I can not send money to everyone. Even if I do, it will only keep them alive. Meanwhile, I just eat the dinner my cook makes and drink a coke...